China

A long bike ride in Folsom

Saturday, May 21st, 2011
My ischial tuberosities, or whatever stands between them and that modern non-cushy seat on the bike I borrowed, hurt. Probably didn’t help that I was riding a mountain bike sized for my 6′4″ brother-in-law. Not complaining, really, it was a nice ride.

Photo_1

The new solar battery charger I got for my phone kept it at 100% all day. I’ve gotta figure a better mount for it for my everyday bike.

Photo_2

Posted via email from Zach’s posterous

Deer encounter video

Saturday, May 21st, 2011
It’s not much, but these 20 seconds made my day.

Deer Encounter on the American River Trail from ZachFine on Vimeo.

A deer stopped by the trail, I think to check out my solar-powered iphone4 battery.

Customer Get Angry (Ai Qi Coffee menu)

Tuesday, May 17th, 2011
I was just paging through a bunch of photos I shot with my iPhone while in China and came across photos I’d shot of a menu that featured some amazing English translations. I present to you a collection entitled “Customer get angry”:

The exterior of Hengdian's Ai Qi Coffee, for context.
Welcome to Ai Qi Coffee. Please have a seat over here in the overstuffed booth fringed with tassels. Here is a glass of boiling-hot water and a menu. Your waitress will be with you shortly.
Customer get angry
I highly recommend this dish. "Customer get angry"
Frozen old duck soup
"Frozen old duck soup" Truth in advertising taken one step too far.
The cold discolored ears, The cold cow shutter
"The cold discolored ears, The cold cow shutter" –Would you like to order an unappetizer?
Chicken rice spent
One of the side-effects of living in China for a while is that "Crispy pigeon" doesn’t even raise an eyebrow. It’s a good translation, and just looks like food. But "Chicken rice spent"? Hilarious.
Spicy beef noodles, bake butterfly
"Spicy beef noodles, bake butterfly" Braise like a bee?
Img 2214
"Onions detonation small cattle" Onions detonation small cattle!
Hawaiian scenery pizza
Hints of lava and surfboard? "Hawaiian scenery pizza". 1
Nalco small cattle baked carbon
"Nalco small cattle baked carbon"
Red pink beautifuls woman
Lovely. "Red pink beautifuls woman"
Coconut amorous feelings
"Coconut amorous feelings" It’s a very emotional drupe.
Flame hockey
"Flame hockey" Game on.
Colocasia esculenta schott pearl milk tea
"Colocasia esculenta schott pearl milk tea"2
Enough to give comfort
"Enough to give comfort" Dayenu.
Low because of Columbia coffee
"Low because of Columbia coffee" You said it buddy, Columbian politics always gets me down too. Let’s stop listening to NPR for a bit.

I really wish I’d asked if I could buy one of these menus, it’s the gift that keeps on giving.
Although I think many of these translations are hilarious, it is worth noting that I don’t think badly of whoever put it together –it was extremely courteous of them. Very very few English speakers ever pop into the small town of Hengdian, let alone drop into Ai Qi Coffee. So kudos to that establishment for trying (and largely succeeding) to accomodate the occasional English-speaker.
Customer not really angry.

  1. Again, those not accustomed to China might also find "Super cows feet pizza" to be noteworthy []
  2. I suspect a scientific name crept into their woeful Chinese-English dictionary []

In which I assert that I am not Paula

Thursday, May 5th, 2011
This just happened:

Photo

Are Asian-Americans reclaiming the C-word now? I was a bit shocked to see it, but I suppose Paula either likes it or plays along.

Posted via email from Zach’s posterous

This is why Chinese children can’t identify animals

Saturday, April 16th, 2011
A delicious box of crunchy amorphous blobs. Good thing they’re each labeled.

Posted via email from Zach’s posterous

A new life awaits you in the off-world colonies

Saturday, April 16th, 2011
Photo

I would kill for a copy of this poster. If anyone in shanghai sees these odes to civic pride being taken down, can you please grab me one?

Posted via email from Zach’s posterous

Someone is a big Haibao fan

Saturday, April 16th, 2011
Photo

Haibao is either the mascot of the 2010 world exposition or a puffy blue tooth that stole George Lucas’s hair curl.

Posted via email from Zach’s posterous

Shanghai: Apartment Shopping

Saturday, April 16th, 2011
Photo

Catching up on posting a few photos from that sojourn in Shanghai. This one was shot in a dusty hutong in Shanghai. Grease from a jianbing seems to have clouded my iPhone’s camera. I think I remember at the time choosing not to wipe it off because it looked interesting. The kid in this photo has the perfect kind of barely-reactive wary look. Better that than succumb to overwhelm, can’t have a billion people throwing a tantrum!

Posted via email from Zach’s posterous

Happy first day of spring, LA marathon walkers!

Sunday, March 20th, 2011
Image

You’ve squicked your way past the 11 mile point…

Photo_2

…try to stay ahead of the fuzz. If I were you, I’d keep the Bachman novel, “The Long Walk” in mind for motivation. My hat’s off to anyone who ran or walked or rolled today, amd especially to those who’re spending 8+ hours in the rain, walking the course.

Posted via email from Zach’s posterous

Had a fun China Post experience

Friday, March 4th, 2011
We sent back some of our belongings by sea using China Post. They gave the contents of every box an examination. They were especially thorough with our albums of wedding photos.

Photo

(note: Chinese wedding photos happen before the marriage)

Posted via email from Zach’s posterous